Sometimes both partners want to be sexual, but one or both is not interested in sex with his or her spouse. This issue often arises in couples counseling. As long as both partners in a relationship are open about their feelings and physical needs and both are satisfied with the frequency and quality of their sexuality, the couple can not only survive, but thrive. Sure, this sounds horribly unromantic, but really it's quite the opposite. Yes, it is a healthy way for couples to bond emotionally. In fact, numerous studies have shown that lack of sex corresponds directly with marital instability and thoughts of leaving a relationship. Many couples take frequent weekends or holidays just for this purpose. And there is always the possibility that one partner may be having an affair. This may or may not be an issue, depending on the couple. Of course, if you and your partner have gone several weeks or even months without sex and the lack of activity is troubling you, you may want to consider some changes.
Typically, they only worry about things if they are sexually addicted and their carnal compulsivity is causing problems. This is especially true for couples who qualify as "sexless. Some people are heterosexual; others are homosexual or bisexual. Yes, it is a healthy way for couples to bond emotionally. Often in such cases the real issue is that things have gone a little stale. Plan a surprise date that involves an activity you know your partner enjoys even if it's not your favorite thing to do. It might be a turn-on for you, too. Lack of sexual interest may also be the result of an underlying psychological condition such as depression, anxiety, drug or alcohol addiction, a behavioral addiction, low self-esteem, unresolved childhood trauma, an attachment deficit disorder, etc. And there is always the possibility that one partner may be having an affair. That's the way it is, that's who we are and there is nothing inherently right or wrong with any of it. That said, many couples do find infrequent sex to be an issue. This may or may not be an issue, depending on the couple. Diminishing hormone levels, the aging process and the distractions of life tend to lower our sex drives and our ability to perform , and there's not a whole lot we can do about it. Plus, all of the above are terrific forms of sexual foreplay should you wish to go all the way. These caring professionals can be found via websites like www. If a person is getting his or her sexual needs met on the side with regular porn use or in-vivo , he or she is likely to be less interested in sex at home. Setting aside and committing to a time to be emotionally and physically intimate gives you and your partner something to look forward to. It's amazing what a little change of venue can do for a stale sex life. Now is the time to talk about it with your partner. About 15 to 20 percent of long-term couples fall into this category. Of course, if you and your partner have gone several weeks or even months without sex and the lack of activity is troubling you, you may want to consider some changes. It is also important to recognize that you and your partner can be physically intimate without actually having sex. If you find that to be the case in your relationship, try one or more of the following tips: For most couples, especially those who've been together for a number of years, companionship, reliability and a sense of mutual trust are far more meaningful than a lot of hot, sweaty sex. Take your art-lover wife to a museum, your sports-junkie husband to a pro football game. After all, who doesn't look forward to a massage? This issue often arises in couples counseling.
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